life changed
2 years life in Australia just flies. Before, I have lived with my family 20 years. In 20 years, I always have my parent’s hard shell to protect me. When I just away from home, I lose the hard shell from my parents…
The main purpose to come to Aus is my Education. I promised my parents that I have to work hard and not to make them worry of me. I will not waste 1 cent coin. My biggest dream is to be a dancer, be independent and have my own living and money.
I have never thought that it is a very hard to come to Aus by Myself. Everybody asked me how I can come here without any frineds and relatives. I said: " I just do it!!" I thought I have made the wrong choice for myself. I always stayed in my room by myself after coming back from dance. All the hard time I have, I don’t understand why I always have it. I used to want to give up everything including my life.
Till the time I moved into Allen St, I start breaking my parents promise. I made the decision for myself to go party with my freinds whitout let them know. I just thought why I don’t give myself an opportunity to see and learn different things. I started don’t tell my parents what I have done in Australia. But, I felt sorry.
1st time stepped into a night club. It is very dark. I can smell the alcohol and I can hear the music is loud. I can see everybody is so intoxicated. Most of them are drunk and happy. The last time I went, I have seen people taking drugs and some men just came to me asking inappropriate buisness. Just recently, I have a housemate and her drinks got spike by somebody. I just reliazed why my parents want to protect and worry of all the time. As a result, I have to make the solution for myself without my parents helping.
I started flash back my independet life. All I have been though 2 years in Aus, these are all the begining of the lord test. I used to think to end my life. End up, I just thought that it is not worth it to end it. If I end it, I fail this test. When I worry so many things here, all my nice friends gave me a lot of positive word. First time, I felt strange that Aus people like to say " Everything is going to be alright, all you need is to keep trying hard and not to give up everything. Chin Up and Smile!! :- ? I have never heard this positive sentence into my mind since i came here.
Before graduation, I talked to my on the phone. I said: " Dad, I really thank a lot to you have sent me a lot of money for me to get my education. I would like you to know that I am not the 20 years daugther always besides you. I want to live independent. I can’t ask you to protect me from everything. I als can’t ask my love to protect me too. I know you have been through the hard time when you were young. I also have to go through the hard time same as you were young.. There are plenty of things are waiting for me to see."
I felt very painful when I said these words. I know it is going to be hurt. In my culture, most of the girls have to stay with their parents. Some chinese family are still following the traditional that woman can’t make the decision for themselves. That is only parents or man permission. And, I have to break this traditional because I do not want to hold back.
In these 2 years, what I have seen and who I have met. That must be a reason for me to learn from them. I have learnt from heartbroken, pain, failure and stress. I will not regret what I have been through. All my believe and strength are always with me. When I passed all my exams, I start telling myself. " All my achievements are from my hard work, I hope there is a new life for me to walk. I will not go back where I was before. "
I also do some pray. I pray for faith but I don’t pray for success. I brought up from religion places. I have studied Buddhism and Christian when I was young but I am not very religious person. I studied religion is all about morals and pure. i need to keep religion is to keep my moral values with me all the time. This is why i choose to be FREE THINKER.
I agreed what my friend, Jared told me.. Human life is all about learning and it also a choice. All cultures are the same but the differences cultures are wheather, Environment, Fashion, Politics, Religion, Lifestyle and Up brigning. I learn all different cultures and I take the good ones to walk with my life.
Things are meant to be happening which are meant to be happening. A person left me, hurt me, and broke my heart. I don’t want to "HATE" the person. Hate is the most painful feeling in life. It is always no hate and no pain, be interested in what people might teach you. I always appreaciate what people have taught me.
